[retrodictive]----[totally exquisite ;]

Tuesday, 30 September 2008

Im sure u all noe tat i had quarelled with xin ling and her friends-weiqi and enmei. Honestly,i dun wish to start a blog war or anything. but in order to clear my name,i have to write smthing. In case i am labled as 'UNRESONABLE' and is the one in the wrong.i could hv wrote this a long time along,but chose not to as i really dun wan to quarrel,juz treat each other like strangers,is enuff,but today,i saw her blog and saw wad she hv to say,i really hv to clear my name.

Firstly, i hv written in my blog how unhappy i am wif en mei and i had told xl all about it becos she noe tat smthing is wrong b4 tat (between me n enmei) and she agreed wif me after knowing wad i felt,so i can say tat she ,in particular, noes how i felt about enmei. During the first few days after i had quarrelled wif enmei, xl,weiqi and i sticked together and bcos xl felt tat enmei is trying to 'take' weiqi bac, xl,when ever she saw enmei approaching, she'll tell us to avoid enmei and we would juz get away from enmei. after tat quarrel,i felt tat i had finally found real friend hu is willing to hear me out instead of expecting me to hear them the WHOLE TIME... i was juz naive. juz like xl says, she talked to enmei and all tat.Well,at first ,i saw tat xl is becoming really friendly wif her,i was confused ,didn't she encourage me to avoid enmei and she had even told me,"in my opinion,i really dont wan u told talk to enmei,this is wad i tink lah.",WHEN I ask her if i shld talk to enmei again. I SWEAR TAT I WAS NOT IGNORING HER ,but only thinking about it...For too long,i guess,tat it made her fell tat im angry n is ignoring her. Then,i conclude tat this is her thinking n she gt her freedom to make friends,thus,i tried to talk to her again,but she was hostile and very polite towards me.later,when i sms her,asking y she is ignoring ME and wad had happened,she repiled tat she found enmei had changed,thought i was ignoring her, make frineds wif enmei after wad she had said to me...but the worst thing she said is ,"When u starts to talk to me again,i was suspicious" And "I dun see y u still cant accept enmei."

Suspicious of me? for wad? suspicious tat i juz wanna talk to her bcos i wanted her to help me get revenge on enmei? AND after encouraging me me to avoid enmei(you can read in my cbox,"Avoid her lah...") and saying tat she dun really wan me to talk to enmei, SHE,CANT SEE WHY I CANT ACCEPT ENMEI AND SHE,IN PARTICULAR,KNOWS HOW MUCH ANGER AND HURT I HAD SUFFERED WHILE I WAS WITH ENMEI!!
So now, juz becos enmei had changed in a blink of an eyelid, I was left alone and became the person in the wrong while enmei became the person in the right. so being wif her for more then 3 years is equal only to less then a week.I dun really noe tat like xl said,my voice became cold and hard and all tat...maybe i am just emptying the poison collected while i am influence by enmei? Btw,xl,are u so sure tat u had nvr spoken in tat kind of voice to me? No offence. wad do u tink i felt when during the ss project presentation, im the only one without the script? enmei collected it back less than a day wad do u tink i am? superhuman with powerful memory? And from the looks on evry group members face when its my turn to present,i can see tat THEY tink im the i at fault. Have i typed anything wrong?inform me then.

posted @ 16:12

Sunday, 14 September 2008

Is it wrong to stand up for urself when u r unhappy? is it wrong to 'get away' from the thing tat spoils ur day?i hv been wif her n tolerating her for some years n a 'fire' had been building inside me. n i had broken free, i wish to cool down first......is it wrong?
posted @ 10:39

Wednesday, 10 September 2008

I am giving all of u the information about wad i felt about this "friend". coz she thinks tat she had done nothing wrong at all...and I AM the one hu had done wrong,being unreasonable for 'avoiding' her...I SWEAR THAT EVERYTHING HERE IS NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH...

I am really tired of the way she make fun of other which i felt is done really cruelly,but she NVER seems to care about others feelings.she said tat i am wrong to avoid her as she had done nothing wrong to me--so does she means tat i muz turn a blind eye to her actions?JUZ like a little kid hu is given a candy so tat the kid wont complain? And when others put up a performance for us,most of them,she found displeasing and thus complains until she SPOILT the show for ME n this happened for quite a lot of time.

i dun like the way she cut in when i am talking,most of the time, she would cut in n rattle on in her opinion OR after i finish talking,she immediately pick up from where i left and rattle on again for such a long time tat no one can cut in.This left me wif an impression tat she nvr hears out others thought,only think tat she is in the RIGHT. Everytime someone mention us The Two Friends, some of they treat me as if im juz her follower,tagging after her, her shadow, juz a useless piece of robot for her to trample on. From the start of the year,she requested to walk home wif me after school and on the way home, she would rattle on again until recently,i kept quiet the whole way.B4 tat,i usually go to the library after school or do smthing else. But after tat,etc. when i go to the library to look for a book to read at home,she would juz nag about going home!!! Yes, JUZ LIKE SHE SAID,she always w8 for me,but she always rushes me, SPOILING MY FREE TIME AGAIN. so im asking all of you : WHY should i give up my FREEDOM, my FUN, my TIME and my PRIDE juz for her? wad do i get in return? HER understanding? HER lending a ear for me?(i felt tat she nvr care to hear out my troubles,nvr caring to console me when i did badly for exam etc. when she hear about my low marks she juz say 'Ohhh' and walk away.Dont u feel tat she is only interested in my marks?n to see if i have win her in a subject?did u gt tat feeling?) DUN MAKE ME PUKE! i noe all of us says that we muz be loyal to our friends n not talk behind their back....but am i suppose to suffer in silence while she bask among the others as if i am nothing? AM I?AM I? i am no miss perfect myself ...i tried to speak up, but most of the time,the moment i open my mouth,she pushed me away n tell every1 about herself blah blah blah. (she claimed tat it is my fault for not speaking up!)

HERE IS SMTHING i am really disgusted wif: A FEW MONTHS AGO,WENT WALKING HOME,SHE HAD JUZ FINISHED HER 'IKAN BILIS WIF CHILLI' N SHE IS LOOKING FOR A BIN TO THROW THE DIRTY PLASTIC BAG IN. SHE PASSED BY A HUGE BIN,THE KIND PPL BURNS THE PAPER MONEY IN. (BTW,I AM A BUDDIST N THIS IS WAD MY RELIGION DO AND SHE IS A CHRISTAN) SHE IMEDIATELY THREW THE PLASTIC BAG RITE INTO THE BIN,WITHOUT LOOKING FOR A PROPER RUBBISH BIN.I TOLD HER TAT SHE SHLD NOT DO TAT AND DO U NOE WAD SHE SAYS?---"I DUN CARE." Doesnt tat tells you tat she tought my religion's thinking is a rubbish? n burning paper money is stupid? n the bin used is juz like a rubbish bin???? n she still DARE to tell every1 tat she had been a really good friend to me n had nvr done anything wrong to me n tat im unreasonable??!!

Putting up this post have its own consequences i noe this may make others feel that i am a betrayal n gradually,i will be left alone.But at least i had at last said,i mean typed ,out my feelings. You will never understand this feeling.
posted @ 18:48